Monday, July 20, 2015

Dumb and Dumber To

I almost don't want to write this review, because it would mean having to admit I have seen this movie. I really want block out the whole thing. But if I have to say I saw the movie then here goes. Avoid this move like it was a warm glass of laxatives disguised as a good luck toast. I have said it once I'll say it again. Don't make a sequel for nostalgia's sake. Make a sequel if the story is strong enough to warrant a movie. This one was not.

I don't want to recap the movie because it's still too painful. Let’s just say that Harry (A fucking Emmy Award Winner Jeff Daniels) and Lloyd (Jim Carrey) are the same but now they are looking for what they think is Lloyds daughter, Penny (Rachel Melvin). They stumble into lots of great setups for fart jokes and a few other scatological hijinks, but really, nothing happens.

I saw the first one and I enjoyed it. It was exactly as it said on the tin. It was at the midnight showing and I had just gotten off of a 12 hour shift so my judgement may have been impaired, but the first one was funny. This one is not funny, and it’s convoluted and doesn't work. The jokes are stale and every punchline takes way too long to get to and once you do hit us with the payoff it doesn't really pay off. I kept hoping that they would stop the movie and say “just kidding.”

The formula is still the same but with only a few changes in side characters. I would have liked to see some progression with the characters. They have this painful joke about Lloyd acting like he is in a catatonic state for the past 20 years as a prank. It gives them a reason not to progress the characters. They could have had Harry learn few things while Lloyd remained the same character because of the prank. That stinker is the opening of the film. You would think that it would at least get a little better if you start out so low. It doesn't.

In this go-round, Rob Riggle is the butt monkey who takes all of the abuse from the two idiots while he is trying to kill them. I am so sorry he has to have this on his list of credits. If anything Hollywood should give him more films so he can push the stink of this film further down his credit list.

I literally left the theater in a worse mood than when I went in. Every joke that bombed was another kick to the groin. I was so embarrassed for these people who can and have done so much better. You could tell they were selling it for all they were worth, but the material was just not funny. I can't even tell if it was just me because the theater I was at was empty except for me. Well that may be telling right there. I only went because it was showing next.

I understand the need to recapture the magic of something that worked once but it’s like smoke: once it's in the wind it's gone. You can only enjoy it for that one moment. You look sad when you try and get the same magic out of a manufactured moment. Like a high school graduate going back to the campus 20 years later to remember the glory days it should be a private walk down memory lane, not filmed and packaged as a bad movie.

Do you want to know the most annoying sound in the world.... this movie. Let's all just pretend this sordid affair didn't happen and we can go on with our lives. 

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